


The way I look at you

by lingdidi



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, at least i think so !! if i missed anything please lmk and i'll fix it !, roommate yangyang, unrelated but idk if i'd be able to live with yangyang as my roommate sKJNGDSKJG
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:15:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22150027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lingdidi/pseuds/lingdidi
Summary: You've never really been the kind of person who'd wish to be in a relationship or felt like they needed it to be happy. If it happened, it happened.However, somehow, one day the sight of people around you being happy and in love makes you wish that Liu Yangyang, your roommate and the person you loved, would love you too,that he'd look at you 'the way you look at the person you love'.
Relationships: Liu Yang Yang/Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 36





	The way I look at you

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little something I wrote for myself! I don't really have a crush on anyone, but I do find this kind of stories sweet! And sometimes I like to daydream about that kind of feeling; the feeling of looking at the person you love differently from how you look at everyone else, just because the feeling is different. I hope you guys enjoy this !

A smile was painted on Yangyang’s face as soon as he heard the front door open. He was sitting on the couch playing a videogame but immediately pressed the pause button and turned his head to greet you.

However, his enthusiasm faltered a little when he saw you. You looked tired. Not only in your posture, with your backpack hanging from your shoulders, but also and especially in your expression. It looked almost empty of emotion, with your mouth relaxed but its corners turned down, and a lost gaze in your eyes that had lost their usual brightness.

You didn’t even respond to his soft greeting as you closed the front door behind you and you began to make your way to your room. Yangyang just looked at you in silence for a few seconds, but left the controller on the couch and got up to follow you once you disappeared from his line of sight and into your room.

He followed the steps you had taken and stopped in front of your door in silence before knocking. He heard something being dropped to the floor, probably your backpack, and then he heard your chair being pulled back and then moving again.

He knocked on the door twice, although neither of you usually did that, since you two were close after having been roommates for two years and having known each other for three years longer than that. In fact, you two never really had the door of your rooms closed unless in those times when you wanted to study and he had his friends over. You were his best friend, and he hoped he was yours too. Therefore, he didn’t wait for you to say anything before walking in. Actually, judging from your state, you most likely wouldn’t have responded at all.

When he opened the door he saw you sitting at your desk, somewhat slouched back with your phone in your hands, silently moving your thumb to scroll down. He walked in silently and stood in front of you, reaching down to your hand that you weren’t using to hold your phone. You didn’t stop him from grabbing it and finally looked up at him, putting your phone down.

—“Are you okay?” —He asked softly. You rarely looked this… sad. Usually, both of you would smile and joke around even during tough and tiring days, keeping the atmosphere positive. But this was bringing even his mood down.

—“It’s nothing. It’s just nonsense. I’ll be over it in a while.” —Not satisfied with your answer, he pulled on your hand towards him, forcing you to get up from your chair and follow him to the living room again.

He sat back on the couch and you sat next to him, looking at him with curious eyes as he grabbed the controller he had previously abandoned and placed it on your lap before reaching to grab one of the spare ones you guys had to play together and for when your friends came over.

—“Let’s play!” —Yangyang exclaimed, smiling at you. You frowned for a second. You weren’t exactly in the mood to play videogames right now. But as you looked at his smile, you understood what he was trying to do.

He was probably trying to distract you from whatever was troubling you, thinking that if you wanted to be over it, perhaps this way it’d happen sooner and you’d go back to your usual state. Your frown vanished and instead you smiled softly at him. You were glad he knew you well enough, so that even when you tried to act like you wanted to be alone and deal with your problems or thoughts by yourself, he would know you didn’t actually want to be alone and he’d stay next to you.

You let go of his hand and grabbed the controller, turning your head to look at the tv screen where the game was still paused where he left it before.

—“Okay, let’s play!” —You repeated his words.

As soon as you started the game, you tried to keep your thoughts about everything else away so that they wouldn’t distract you, instead replacing it with the fake competitiveness of wanting to win against each other in the game, and laughing every once in a while at mistakes the other did. Sometimes it seemed like Yangyang was playing worse than usual on purpose, but looking at him from the corner of your eyes and seeing his focused expression, you saw he was probably struggling for real. You chuckled at the sight. Of course Yangyang would never let you win on purpose.

When the game was over and you won, you cheered for yourself, while Yangyang threw his head back on the couch and whined about his loss. After laughing for a while both out of the happiness from winning the game and Yangyang’s face of being disappointed on himself, you left the controller next to you and made yourself comfortable on the couch, facing Yangyang.

He looked at you as you did that and then imitated your actions, sitting cross-legged on the couch facing you. Your smile faltered a little but didn’t disappear when you thought about your next words, but you decided to speak your thoughts just as they were in your head.

—“I’m jealous of the people around me.” —Yangyang’s eyes widened slightly in curiosity, not really knowing what you meant. You understood his reaction and kept going, but now you were starting to feel a little embarrassed over talking about this with him. You felt your cheeks redden as you spoke. —“Everyone around me is falling in love, dating, finding someone they want to be with, having someone that looks at them in a special way…” —

—“Are you jealous because you don’t have a boyfriend?” —He asked straightforwardly, and the way he simplified the ‘problem’ made your blush intensify. You wanted to protest, but for a second you couldn’t find your words and just stuttered. He spoke again.— “There’s no hurry to find someone. We’re still young. Isn’t that what you said too?” —

You hated that he had said that, because he was right. You had said that in more than one occasion, yet here you were. Why couldn’t he just joke around like always and tease you for feeling like that instead of being embarrassingly truthful?

—“It’s not exactly that! I- It doesn’t have to be dating someone! I just want someone to like me in that way!” —The more you spoke, the more embarrassed you felt. You didn’t know why you couldn’t just stop talking, drop the topic and try to go back to something else, like the videogame, acting like nothing happened. Instead, you spoke again.— “I want someone to look at me like people look at the person they like.” —

Yangyang was smirking as you talked, and as embarrassed as you were already without him teasing you about it, it almost made you feel a little bit better because it took off a little of the seriousness of the situation.

‘I want you to look at me like people look at the person they like’. Without realizing, you spoke those words in your head as you two looked at each other’s eyes.

—“But what if it’s someone who you don’t like back? Wouldn’t that be too awkward?” —He asked, and you froze, not knowing what to say. You couldn’t tell him that it wouldn’t be awkward since he was the person you wanted to like you back, and you did agree on that.

You remembered the time one of Yangyang’s classmates had a crush on him and how painful it had been to watch her keep trying even after he had tried to make clear that he didn’t feel the same way, even going as far as asking you if you and Yangyang were dating and if that was the reason why he rejected her. You almost shivered just from remembering that. You still felt bad for the girl when you thought about it, but she just couldn’t take the hints, not even when they were completely straightforward and Yangyang said he didn’t like her.

—“Mm… I guess…” —You answered in the end. — “Then… Maybe I want to experience liking someone and them liking me back.” —You admitted. Yangyang was serious again, and once more, you hated that. Why couldn’t he give you a reaction? Something that let you at least wonder if he felt anything at all for you. Maybe you were just like that girl.— “I… Want the person I like to look at me the way I look at them.” —

He still didn’t respond, and instead you looked directly into each other’s eyes. You felt your hands start shaking slightly from sudden nervousness. He didn’t say anything, but also didn’t stop looking at you. Each second that went by made you feel even more anxious. And after who knows how many seconds of silence, Yangyang leaned in and, closing his eyes, he pressed his lips on yours and his hands reached to yours. Instinctively, your eyes closed too.

And ironically enough, it wasn’t until you closed your eyes that you finally saw it clearly. The meaning of the way he just looked at you in silence. The feeling behind the way he grasped your hands in his softly but tightly enough as if he didn’t want to let go. The feelings he hid behind the shine in his eyes when you looked at each other. The feelings that were the same as yours.

He slowly pulled away, and now being aware of his feelings, you felt too embarrassed to look him in the eyes again and just looked down at your linked hands with a shy smile. You reprimanded yourself in your head for being so blind despite how much you wanted to see, and couldn’t help but laugh at yourself a little when even Yangyang reproached you about it.

—“What else do I have to do for you to know?” —He asked, and you finally looked up and made eye contact again.— “To make you see through my eyes and realize that I’ve always looked at you the way you look at the person you like?” —


End file.
